Let’s be honest—being a mom is a full-time gig with zero off days, and the perks? Well, they include unlimited snuggles, sticky handprints, and a profound sense of purpose that’s worth all the chaos. But in the whirlwind of snack-making, school runs, and deciphering the latest tantrum, it’s easy to feel like “mama” is the only title you’ve got left. And while that’s a title we wear with pride, let’s not forget the other parts of us that have been, shall we say, shoved in the dark corner of closet somewhere.

Remember that person you were before motherhood? The one who had hobbies, passions, and dreams that didn't revolve around remembering to buy treats for the class party? She’s still in there, somewhere between soccer practice and learning the "new math". And the good news? It’s time to let her out to play again—if only to remind yourself that you’re more than just a snack-dispensing, bedtime-negotiating superhero.

The Art of Self Discovery

So, how do we go about finding the “you” that existed before the “and”? It starts with a little reflection, a sprinkle of grace, and maybe a cup of coffee that hasn’t been reheated three times. Here’s how to get started:

1. Take a Trip Down Memory Lane (Minus the Cringe) Remember when you used to have hobbies? Like, actual interests that didn’t involve trying to outsmart a toddler? Think back to what you loved doing before “mama” became your primary role. Did you have a passion for painting, a knack for baking, or an obsession with house plants? Start by remembering those things and know that they’re still a part of you—just maybe a little dusty from lack of use.

   
   

2. Start Small (We’re Talking Baby Steps Here) You don’t need to overhaul your life overnight. Let’s face it, you’re already juggling a lot. Instead, start by carving out a few minutes a day to revisit those forgotten passions. Miss those spicy smut novels? Sneak in a chapter before bed (or pop the airpods in and multitask during the day). Used to paint? Set up a little corner where you can dip your brush back into creativity. Even small steps count when you’re rediscovering yourself.

1. Bring the Kids Along for the Ride Okay, so maybe your “me time” isn’t what it used to be, but that doesn’t mean you can’t involve the kiddos. Share your hobbies with them—who knows, you might just spark a new family tradition. Plus, there’s something magical about seeing your little ones get excited about the things you love.

   
   

2. Cut Yourself Some Slack (Seriously, You’re Doing Great) Here’s the thing—rediscovering yourself isn’t about adding another task to your to-do list. It’s about giving yourself permission to be more than just a mom. Some days you’ll bask in the glory of doing something for yourself, and other days you might not even get to use the bathroom alone. And that’s okay. Celebrate the small wins and know that you’re making progress, even when it feels slow.

   
   

3. Celebrate Your “Me” Moments (However Brief They May Be) Did you manage to finish a cup of coffee while it was still hot? Or sneak in five minutes of yoga before the chaos began? These are victories, my friend! Every time you embrace self discovery, give yourself a mental high-five. You’re on the path to rediscovering all the amazing things that make you you, and that’s worth celebrating—preferably by doing more things that bring you joy.

Embracing the “And”

Here’s the truth: Motherhood doesn’t erase who you were; it simply adds another (very important) layer to your identity. By rediscovering the “you” before the “and,” you’re not just enriching your life—you’re setting an example for your kids that it’s okay to be more than just one thing

So, if you’re feeling like “mama” is all you are these days, take a deep breath and remember—you’re so much more. Those other parts of you are still there, waiting to be dusted off and brought back to life. And when you do, you’ll find that being a mom and all the other things you love is not only possible, it’s pretty darn amazing.

Here’s to rediscovering, reclaiming, and relishing in all the facets of who you are. Because you’re not just a mom—you’re a whole lot more, and it’s time to let the world see it.

With a wink and a smile,

Soul Searcher and mama